I got some towels for Christmas. There were other gifts sporting tags with my 26-letter handle on them, so they were either meant for me or named after me, but let's talk about the towels: really big, very fluffy, and bright white. The towels, that is, not me. I'm not very fluffy.

These towels have a spongy absorbency that my other towels don't have. When I dried myself off this morning I thought about how much more rapidly these new towels soak up water than my other towels. Is it that towel technology has gotten better, or that towels lose their soak-up-ing-ness when they get old?

Have I hung on to my old towels too long, wasting precious moments every morning in superfluous skin-mopping?

The big question is this: how many times can you re-use the same towel before etiquette dictates that it be laundered? Once? Twice? Sixty? Rumor has it I'm clean after I shower, so drying off shouldn't make the towel any dirtier. But then again there's the dead skin issue. How does that factor into the equation? Clearly, I need advice from those in the know. If you are in the know, drop some science on me.

Whatever the case, I'm now one hoopy frood who knows where his towel is.

Song in my head: "Inanity Over Christmas" by Madness